The cure to everything is patience
Posted: January 15th, 2022, 10:47 am
The cure to everything is patience, no matter what I pray or how much dua I make I still have to be patient in everything. I used to think if I make a dua then Allah will give it to me but noo. whenever I make dua I never get anything because it is always bad for me so now I have stopped making dua cause everything is bad for me. It's been years. I'm tired now. people say try getting close to Allah. I started praying 5 times and tahhjud but still suffering if Allah is listening then why am I still suffering? I am not asking for money, I'm not asking for a girl. I just want peace. I don't wanna overthink. I just want Allah to be happy with me and I'm trying everything I can. I admit that I'm the biggest sinner on earth maybe I have more sins than Shaitan. but I still pray I never said He's not there. I know he listens to people but why not me? I don't want anything. I want to feel him. I want to know that my prayers are okay. I have been asking for Allah's help cause I can't do it alone but I don't have any hope left. I'm hopeless now. I'm not strong. I've been begging him but he's nowhere to be seen. so now I'm almost confirmed that He hates me and my Destination is hell. That's why I don't get sakoom even after praying 5 times. I don't want to ask for ease in my duas because that will give me hope. I can't bear being disappointed. I'm trying to accept that I'll never have friends, What do I do? I can't let my demons win because I'll never see the face of Allah. However, holding on hurts like hell. I'm dying inside. I wish I was dead.